You can Count how many seeds in an apple but cannot Count how many apples in one seed
Posted: September 25, 2007This is true.
The power of 1 seed.
The outcome of that 1 seed that can influence generations and generations of apples.
This is very thought provoking for me when I think about this concept and apply it on parenting. My influence on my child will have many direct impact on my child’s child and generation ahead.
So what is parenting then ? It is not an obligation. It is not something just everyone is doing it I am also doing it fad. It is a process. It is a responsibility. It is an enjoyment. It is continuing changing. It is a learning process for parents to identify their goals of parenting. Many parents have the wrong concepts of parenting and thus parenting process is not smooth or worst frustrated for them. These wrong concepts may impact their children and their future. These wrong concepts may be :
a. Child centred parenting
Anything that pleases the child and make them happy, parents will do so.
b. Guilt centred parenting
Parents out of their guilt become too lenient or too strict in parenting their kids
c. Follow older generation parenting
Concepts and styles passed down from parents to children. When the children become parents, they applied the same without thoughts about the environment and the child’s personality to a single style of parenting.
What is the ultimate goal of parenting ? Many of us seem to know the answer but the answers seem to be blurred sometimes too.
a. Was it the Chinese thinking of ” Having a child to take care of them when they are old.” A retirement cushion to lean on ?
b. To provide the best possible (which the parent think it should be) to the child ?
c. Was it to enable the child to be independent and be a happy person to have around ?
Each family has its own answers. The answers has no right and wrong. It depends on family culture and attitudes toward parenting.
For me it was clearer as I begain to experience and learnt to be a more matured parent as my child grows. Parenting is a growing process for me. It is through my daughter that I learnt and matured as an adult. I learnt what it means to be patient when she refused to eat or listen to me repeatedly. I learnt what it means to be role model when she starts to imitate and copy your actions as adults. I learnt to be more sensitive especially in discerning her behaviour as being childishness or rebellious. I learnt physical endurance especially when I need to carry her and her baby stroller when travelling with her. And many many more ….
The influence of parents on their child has an tremendous impact on the child. The child’s value and attitude, perspective, ability to overcome difficulties, ability to respect and appreciate others are all drawn mainly from the parents.
So if the child is the apple seed. The number of apple seeds that this apple seed can produce in future. The quality of the apples are all dependent of these seeds. So, it is essential and necessary for parents to understand, aware and make conscious effort to focus on imparting the right values, teaching the right attitudes especially when they are young.
